LETTER TO MY SINGLE AND MARRIED FRIENDS.

At this point I write to my single and married friends. We are what we are today because of information we got yesterday and the truth remains we will be somewhere else tomorrow still because of information will are getting today.
I thought it wise to share this simple facts of life. Life is a gift from God and love is a gift we received from God to share (give) both to ourselves and others in the right way for a better future,  for the purpose of our joy and happiness. If all these are not done properly, life becomes a living hall. In that case, relationships wouldn't work out the way planned for and marriages became questions God need to ask and give reason why things are the way they are!

To my  single friends:
If you are serious about changing your circumstances. Of course , it all begins with renewing the mind. There are right reasons and wrong reasons for desiring marriage. This brings to light the fact that you must have sense of your own personal value before you can expect someone else to recognise it. First, God will never allow another person to be your affirmation and completion. This is a job He has reserved for Himself, if someone was able to complete you, there would be no need for Him. This is something He will not stand.  The person who could add all that you're looking for to your life is also looking for someone who can add something to his life. Another person who has nothing to  bring to the party but her need validation will not be an attractive package. Therefore, your only choice would be someone who is as needy as yourself. Could it be that buying the lie that marriage is the end all, be all and the completion of all things worth mentioning has caused us to erect false idols that keep us in bondage to unfulfilled and unhappiness?  Life does not consist of those who makes  me feel that I count. It consists of how much value I add to the life of others".
Your worth will never be measured by whom you attract, but rather by whom you affect and how you affect them. Whether someone chooses you or not does not determine your worth. Your value can never be estimated based on how others feel about you. Dare to break your pattern. Do something different or unusual. Life is a party you created; don't wait to be invited to one. Never put your life on hold! The only thing that should be reserved for marriage is sex. Otherwise, it's time to let the games begin. Until that blessed additional to your life shows up to claim you, get a life . Get one that will make you interesting and intriguing to others. It will draw other exciting people to you.

Tips :
Select an activities that interest you or pull you out of your comfort zone and stretch you. If you choose things that really interest you, chances are there will be other people there with the same interests, the more things two people have in common, the greater their chances are of having a lasting relationship.

Now to my married friends:

I believe in marriage.
I believe in marriage that works.
I believe every marriage needs some mutual interest share by both partner to make it work.
I believe in love and it's true.

I noticed something in this life, no one can do everything he or she would like in life  completely once you are married.  There's just not enough time. Every person's recreational time amount to making choices that will leave out other opportunities. Why not select those activities you can  share as husband and wife. The person with whom you share your most enjoyable moments will build the love home in you. If you want a fulfilling marriage  that person must be your spouse. You should be each other best friend not best roommate. Your mate should know you better than another person in the world even your parents. That includes your good and bad feelings, frustrations, your challenges and fears etc. Remember it is two becoming one!
Your children are visitors in your home and someday they will leave. Why  make them your priority in place of your spouse?
Your parents gave birth to you and helped in making you. They are part of your success story but why make them your priority instead of your spouse.  Sorry to say it. Your parents helped you build a past or a history but your spouse is  building a future with you. So that makes him or her your priority. Remember "greater is the end of thing than the beginning thereof".

Please,  both husband and wife should feel and know that they are the each other's highest priority. When either you or your spouse feel that anything has become a higher priority, take a break and think it over. There is nothing out there that's more important than your relationship, and your success in life will ultimately depends on  it. If your friends, relatives, career, finance, children, or anything else takes a higher priority than the feeling of your spouse,  you are somehow kissing your marriage goodbye.

Tips:
Every husband and wife need to sit down and meditate on this though. ..my partner married me because she or he though the pleasing things I was doing during our courtship would continue for the rest of our lives. Am I holding up my end of bargain?